This Blog was inspired by the confluence of a few things coming together. Towards the end of 2020 I read Scott Sonnenshein’s book called “Stretch”, I can recommend it. A few years ago, I came across an article written about Carol Dweck’s book, “Mindset, the new Psychology of Success” and our Minister, James Gray, who spoke in a service about the Importance of Mindset in making 2021 work for us.
As I write this, we are only a few days into 2021 and already it is clear that this year will not be without its challenges. We can bemoan that and get sucked into the negativity of all that is, or we can accept that circumstances are what they are and can choose a winning mindset and find new ways that serve to inspire us and support those we hold dear.
James is so right, Mindset is Everything. So, let’s explore mindset a bit further.
According to Stanford psychologist Carol Dweck, our beliefs play a pivotal role in what we want and whether we achieve it. Dweck found that it is our mindset that plays a significant role in determining achievement and success. So, what exactly is a mindset?
Neuroplasticity shows that we can learn optimism, develop our strengths and grow our happiness. Rebecca Gladding M.D., author of “You Are Not Your Brain” recently wrote: “The brain, and how we are able to mould it, is fascinating and nothing short of amazing.”
Dweck found that a “fixed mindset” assumes that our character, intelligence, and creative ability are static and cannot change in any meaningful way, and success is the affirmation of that inherent intelligence.
A “growth mindset,” on the other hand, thrives on challenge and sees failure not as evidence of unintelligence but as a heartening springboard for growth and for stretching our existing abilities.
Out of these two mindsets, which we manifest from a very early age, stems a great deal of our behaviour, our relationship with success and failure and ultimately our capacity for happiness.
At the heart of what makes the “growth mindset” so winning, Dweck found, is that it creates a passion for learning rather than a hunger for approval.
People with this mindset are not discouraged by failure, they don’t actually see themselves as failing in those situations — they see themselves as learning.
This is not different to the Victim (Fixed) vs. Survivor (Growth) Mindsets model.
A survivor mentality focuses on overcoming negative triggering events and helps to promote adaptive behaviours. A survivor mentality includes thoughts like:
- I am a survivor, I can adapt & I am resilient
A person suffering from a victim mindset often identifies with self-defeating emotions such as resentment, guilt, anger, and shame and often internally promotes harmful thoughts such as:
- I probably deserved it, everyone takes advantage of me and I could or should have ….
By focusing on our capacity to survive (growth our survival mindset) , we can rise above the constraints of this pandemic or challenges instead of being defined by them.
So, how do we cultivate a Growth or Survival Mindset? For me this is where Sonnenshein’s “Stretch” shows us some practical ways to do so. Outlined below is a summary of his 7 Stretch Ideas:
- Stretch Key Idea #1: It’s easy to get lost chasing what others have
- Focus on what you want to accomplish with the resources at your disposal.
- Stretch Key Idea #2: Outsiders are often more innovative than experts
- First, explore the world and experience new things that help you see things from a different angle
- Stay in touch with what you already know
- Look for solutions outside of your own domain.
- Stretch Key Idea #3: Planning may make us feel safe, but it can also block out valuable information
- Instead of planning, stretchers embrace improvisation as the key to progress. After all, when we improvise, we free ourselves up to move and use resources in the most efficient way
- Stretch Key Idea #4: Low expectations can hamper your relationship to others and yourself.
- Stretchers know that you can overcome such obstacles by developing positive self-expectations, leading to a transformation that allows you to see challenges as opportunities. Having that Growth Mindset.
- Stretch Key Idea #5: A dose of creativity and a willingness to collaborate can boost your success
- Break down mental barriers, get creative and focus on building relationships and collaborating with others and as mentioned above, especially with people outside of our own narrow field of expertise.
- Stretch Key Idea #6: Becoming a stretcher also means holding back avoid overstretching
- Having unrealistically high expectations is a recipe for disaster
- Stretch Key Idea #7: A mental workout is part of maintaining a strong and focused mind and a healthy body
- Look around and identify the resources you have at your disposal but haven’t used. This can turn up all kinds of gems
- If you feel overwhelmed by your work, you should take a breather. Get out of the office, even your home-office and take an afternoon stroll. Stanford University psychologists found that people who take a walk during their breaks are 81% more efficient compared to those who sit.
So, there is some truth in our parents yelling at us to go outside and play. As adults we need to take a break, go outside & “play”, it goes a very long way towards cultivating that growth mindset.
And now some of you may say, Lou-Anne you have no idea, “I lost my job, I have an illness” etc. I empathise with your difficulties, I do. I am inspired by e.g., the pilot living in a luxury winelands estate who lost his job and now delivers things for people and the multitude of examples given in “Dear Life”, of the dying, who chose to live and love more than those Blessed with perfect health. We need to choose a healthy mindset or become another victim to all that is.
Wishing you a Healthy, Happy, Positive and Winning year.
Lou-Anne Lubbe
Find•Your•Wings